Liza Howard. Ultrarunning Mom.

Sorry for the blog outage.  I’ve been mourning the death of my Garmin 305.  Wailing, gnashing teeth, and checking prices of Garmins on Amazon.  Anybody like the 410?

So there’s a chance Asa and I might have our picture in a magazine.  Very exciting.  And if it happens, I want you to know the backstory.

For one reason and another, the magazine wasn’t allowed to use the picture of Asa and me on this website that was taken by the San Antonio Express-News a couple of years back.  They asked if I could send them another one of us running together.  I didn’t have one.  (What mother has a picture of herself frolicking in running clothes with her small child?  When I’m in running clothes, I’m either unshowered and headed out for a run or I’m returning from one drenched in sweat.  In either case, I do not jog around with Asa in a picturesque location looking cute.)  Could I take one in the next three days?  And could we position ourselves a little closer in the frame this time?  My first and overwhelming reaction was: “Of course I can!  How wonderful to be pictured together with my little son in a magazine!”  My second reaction was: “Crap. Crap. Crap.”  Cut to me waking Asa up from an unexpectedly long nap to meet my friends Robert and Lauren and their fancy camera at Eisenhower Park.  Asa was not happy to be awake.  He was not interested in changing into “running clothes”  (t-shirt, jean shorts, and Stride Rites), and he certainly wasn’t interested in getting in the car.  I stuffed the running clothes into my purse and did my best to sell the experience.  He was unimpressed, but compliant.  I put the clothes on him in the back of the car at the park parking lot and then herded him towards the trail head —  just past the playground with the rock climbing wall.  He really really really wanted to play for just a little while before we took pictures.  I recited a laundry list of reasons why we needed to take the pictures right away.  I was scheduled to be back at the park in an hour to do some group coaching and I needed to shuttle Asa back home before that — a 40 minute round trip –, Robert and Lauren were waiting, wha wha wah wah wah.  Asa was distraught.  A rare tantrum ensued.  I thought hateful things about photo editors while I tried to calm him and get his face to stop being red and puffy and tear streaked.  Our cuteness window was about to close.  I tried to sell the pleasures of running again, I cajoled, I was firm and spoke with a serious voice — and then I stooped to bribery.  That’s right.  ”If you stop crying I will buy you a medium sized box of Legos.”  That’s what I want you remember if you ever see this picture.  She just bribed her kid.  Of course it worked.  That’s why parents use bribery.  He stopped crying and after a little clarification about the terms of the bribe (“You have to actually smile, son. Or no Legos.”), the photo shoot was on.  Cuteness was captured — in close proximity.  And then Lauren offered to take Asa home with her kids and feed him Sponge Bob macaroni and cheese and let him watch a movie while I coached.  I hugged her and plopped Asa in the back of her minivan.

It was my first child bribe and I feel pretty low about how the day played out.  Still, Asa seems relatively unscathed.  He chose a Lego ambulance and practiced rescuing Lego car crash victims.  (He could have asked for the Lego ATM robbery set.)   So there’s that at least.